Rethinking the Whole JW Thing

Now that I have been pestered by endless conversation and aggravation since 7:30 am, I'm willing to whore myself out to the first religion that can provide me with some quiet meditation time. No snake dancing, loud talking or music, just quiet alone time in a nice cool clean room. Maybe with some nice soft music or sounds of nature. Just not wild nature children because I already have those. They buzz around me constantly like flies on a turd. Every time I look I can catch one stealing a sip of my drink or a bite of my food and the noise that comes out of their mouths knows no limits.

Actually a good compromise would be to tell the JWs that I've already been expelled (shunned? Is that what they call it?) but that my children are eager to ring doorbells and distribute pamphlets and all they require in compensation is a jug of apple juice and a box of nasty crap fruit snacks. I look at this as a win-win situation. The girls are already accustomed to being told to get the fuck off of the porch and stop ringing the gd doorbell so a little polite rejection will be no skin off of their backs. They'll just ring it again and ask for some ice cream or perhaps a stick of sidewalk chalk. I'll be willing to cough up $25 a week for a free Saturday and Sunday morning.