Thursday, February 21, 2008

May I Please Be Cranky?

Being that I'm a woman, I do have my times of moodiness. Blame it on hormones, lack of sleep, a bad hair day or the phase of the moon, but I am moody. I've met a few women in my lifetime and every one of them has a bad day for no real reason every now and then. This is hardly a newsflash but apparently the man I've been married to for the past eleven years doesn't understand that I can be grouchy without it meaning I want him dead.

I woke up late this morning, in the middle of the wrong part of my sleep cycle because I had been semi-awake for the last two hours trying not to snore. I'm rushing to get Tootie out of the house in time for school and trying to feed Moggie so that she doesn't have a meltdown while Fidel stands around clicking on his blackberry and playing with dogs. And I haven't had coffee yet. It's simple math, really. (Me running out of time + you not helping) - morning coffee = raging bitch wife. There's no need to make it out to be more than it is. If there is time for psychoanalysis of the deeper cause of my bitchiness, there is time to put on a kids shoes or brush their hair, or make the chocolate milk you like you told me you were going to do.

*Disclaimers: No real math was used in this entry. This entry may or may not have been written by the Evil Uterus. Helping your wife is like foreplay to her.


Anonymous said...

No help in the morning from my husband makes me cranky too. Would it kill him to get up 15 minutes earlier so he can shower and be able to help with one of the kids? I have to get myself and both the kids dressed since I take M to school. And while we are on the subject, his hair is an inch long, why does it take so freaking long to fix it. I can put my hair in a ponytail in a matter of seconds. I'm just not sure why he must arrange every hair on his head individually. UGH!

Anyway... back to you... I totally understand your moodiness. :)

AFRo said...

You just described almost every single morning of my life.

AFRo said...

Oh. I'm sorry, but I really have to give props to my DH because I don't touch my children in the morning other than to wet and brush their hair. He handles EVERYTHING else. It's wonderful. But, I am NOT a morning person.

Stacy said...

Ugggg....Men just don't get it. Ashley - it's the type of hair your DH has. Mine has it too and in the time I can get dress, brush teeth, get two children dressed, he will only have gotten his hair done. He arranges every single hair on his head too.