Friday, February 22, 2008

Ok, Chubbs

Yeah, I'm talking to you, blubberbutt. Your assignment for this weekend is to get someone to take a full-length picture of you from the front and from the side. If you are a super genius you can take the picture of yourself. I hear cameras have this function. This will be your before picture. Don't suck in your gut but don't bloat it out either. We won't post these, but you will print them out and mail them all to me. No really, just save it to your computer so that we can do another in 5 weeks, 10 weeks, etc.

You may not use these pictures as evidence of my cult-like influence to get off of whatever crimes you commit in the throes of caloric deprivation. You and I know that we can't control ourselves when we are only consuming 1500 calories a day but I don't think we will be able to convince a jury that we actually lose our minds when we are starving. Perhaps another project for the weekend is drawing up some shirts that read, "Fat chick on a diet, don't cross me." "Get out of my face before I eat you" is another option. I think the first week will be the hardest for us. If we can survive the first seven days we should have a good chance of reducing our muffin tops.

Here's an easy list for you.

  • Take full-length picture.
  • Find food plan suited to you. (I'm doing The Plan included in the Turbo Jam set)
  • Warn your loved ones that you are about to get kooky for a while.
  • Pray for strength.
We can do this, ladies. Enjoy your last weekend of freedom.

6 comments:

so tired said...

Isn't the horrible mental image I have stained in my brain enough?

In the small half bath at my girlfriend's house there is a full length mirror on the back of the door. When you sit down on the toilet you glance over to your right and get a side shot of yourself with your pants down.

It's ugly. Really ugly.

Jennifer said...

I recommend peeing with the lights off in that situation!

Take your picture. You will be glad you did.

Mom O Matic said...

Oh my God - a full length picture. That's too motivating.

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